What does it take to become a writer in the advertising business?
Some recent evidence suggests that little more is required than a reptile brain. I just saw a McDonald’s television ad depicting two semi-slobby looking dudes sitting in a booth (at Mickey D’s, natch) early one morning, stuffing their maws with giant eggy greaseballs soaked in maple syrup, or something. I shall now transcribe, in it’s entirety, the dialogue:
Dude: Man I was hungry when I woke up. I had some major hunger pains.
Other Dude: Pangs.
Dude: Pains.
Other Dude: Pangs.
Dude: Pains.
Other Dude: Pangs.
Dude: Whatever.
Commercial Writer: And… scene. Now give me my money.
Me: What the hell was that crap?
Commercial Writer: That was my attempt to entice you into enjoying delicious and nutritious McDonald’s breakfast items.
Me: You suck.
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